& today felt good too. i still love dancing. i wish i was younger. i wish i could still get on stage. i see photos from my friends of their performances & i miss it. i miss performing. i feel like it shouldn't be over for me. i'm gonna be 34 next month. i definitely have friends that are older that are dancing professionally & are amazing, but they never moved to a tiny island in the middle of nowhere & cut all ties, err... pointe shoe ribbons, to the dance world. not that i was really where i wanted to be before the move to guam. i mean i wasn't dancing for royal ballet or anything, but it was my career, my 9-5 & i was on stage & training & at least dancing at a respectable level. with hopes of performing more roles, more ballets, more, more, more? who knows. i'm sure i'll keep taking class, but it's so different when you are preparing for performance...... putting yourself into the story of a ballet, thinking about your character, hearing the same music over & over (or studying that same music over & over - stravinsky, you brilliant crazy composer you)..... going into the theater, the lighting, the dressing rooms..... i miss it. um. yeah. that's all. i just miss it. & i feel like it's over. it happens to everyone at some pointe. i just wish i felt fulfilled, ready for it to be over. that happens right? or do we always want more?
class
back at it. that dancing thing. took class last saturday & again today. last week was the 1st class i had taken since surgery. it felt really good. & it was with a guest artist from the philippines who was fantastic. i was sore for almost a week.
underwater world
underwater world is an aquarium here on guam. we took lena there on saturday & we all had a great time! admission is only $11.50 for military. fun thing to do on a (rainy) saturday afternoon. we saw sharks, sting rays, sea turtles, sea horses, eels, a snake, nemo, tiger fish, jelly fish, reef fish & got to pet a blue star fish!
there is a huge tank with a long walk through tunnel, so cool
nemo
this is lena's gesture for "i want"
lena & the fishies
things not to forget
ok, so little one, you are 15 months old! it is so crazy! you are walking/ running up a storm, babbling non-stop, discovering new & awesome stuff everyday! you make daddy & i smile all the time & we talk about how awesome you are everyday (& we call you our little best friend)! you really are such a cool little person! we LOVE you!!!!
here are some of your latest & greatest....
-you say "uh-oh" when you drop something
-you will walk & squat down a little like you're looking for something - it's adorable!
-you are dancing (bopping your head & doing your plies)
-i feel like you understand us so well. you may not be saying many words (in english) but you understand the things we say!
-you try to put our flip flops on your feet, then on your hands & on your arms & then you wear them around like a bracelet
-you know where nose, eye, mouth, ear, hand, & feet are & will point to them when we ask you
-you point to things a lot & when you're really excited you have a look of amazement on your face - your eyes are huge, your mouth opens wide, you point & say "OH!" - we love it!
-you love hearing the airplanes & pointing out the window to them (or up to the sky - you've got sharp eyes too, because you frequently see the plane before mommy)
-you love being outside, playing & exploring
-you are so adventurous & curious, you have a real strong desire to see, learn, interact & figure things out
-you love reading - you spend a lot of time at your bookshelf looking through your books & you'll also bring books to us so that we'll sit you on our laps & read them to you
-you give hugs & sigh & hmmm when we hug & snuggle
we love you so much my dear! you are our light, you make us so happy & we are cherishing every moment we have! you are awesome!!
guest post
kristina over at my traveling troop (click for the link) is putting together some posts about military life at overseas locations. & i happen to be one of the guest posts about guam! she has a super cute blog that is a great resource for military families! check it out! & my friend pam from living in so-called paradise also has a post about guam there too!
priest pools
so we went with our friend cindy to priest pools this past week. it's all the way on the south part of the island... you turn right at a church, take a left at the store that looks like a house but has sale signs in the windows, walk down a driveway, follow the grass path & arrive at the start of the pools. (gotta love guam directions). but the pools are lovely. they start out as a small creek & the water flows into these pools formed by what looks to be like lava rocks.... & they continue down the mountain...... pool, waterfall, pool, waterfall.... it's awesome! of course it was kinda rainy, kinda sunny.... so guam. & we got rained out a little, but we had a fun time & my little one is turning into quite the brave (independent) adventurer.
humid hike :)
looking down the mountain
"i do" (her favorite words) in action,
with mommy trying to keep up....
& yes she got all the way up there on her own
curious kid
& the rain
at least lena's not phased by the rain....
marbo (marvo?) caves
ok guam people you have to go here! it is amazing & so easy to get to! i can't believe we haven't been before now. well my friend cindy took lena & i to the caves this week & we had so much fun hanging out in the cave & swimming in the water. you drive down this road until it dead ends, hike a little down the road & find the cave entrance to your left. then it's just a short climb down into the cave & then you're standing on a man made concrete platform in front of the fresh water pools. i'm so glad cindy was there to help.... A. because she knew where it was & B. you can't really do this experience by yourself with a baby. it wasn't hard, but you can't climb down into the water while you're holding a baby & i'm not brave, um crazy, enough to jump in holding lena. no thanks.
the water feels amazing & there are really deep parts (deep enough to jump off parts of the cave into the water) & places that are shallow where you can sit on the rocks. cindy showed us a way to swim through the cave to get to the back pools. it was really cool, but in the moment i felt a little scared because you're basically swimming through this narrow path, cave rocks on either side of your head, & cindy's holding lena because i'm too afraid i'll dunk her, but we made it to the other side. & it is deep & dark over there. but the water is still crystal clear so you can see all the way to the bottom. so no fear of critters. i think. ;)
so we hung out a little while, met some japanese tourists & then headed home. it is a must do again for sure!
lena & i sitting on a rock in the water

say "cave"

the entrance to the cave (looking up from the pools)
little explorer
blurry, but check out the water! crystal clear!
some of the japanese tourists (aka. bunch of young guys wearing floaties & snorkel masks)
we HAD to get a picture with them
time ???
yep, i'm a total slacker when it comes to this blog. sorry. i honestly have kinda been thinking about giving it up. & really only 2 of you read this, but it still is such a great way to keep a record of our lives. & as my sister says "you of all people should be blogging!" being so distant is pretty tough.
so an update. lena is a crazy, wonderful, strong-willed, independent, cuddly, curious, sweet, funny, sleeping in her crib all through the night, walking, almost running toddler. yep. i can't believe it. at almost 14 months now & she's getting her molars (so fun), she's waving, giving high fives, giving kisses, playing with the trash & the toilet (yuck), eating pretty well & dribbling jeff's soccer ball all through the house. we go on play dates, we go to the pool, we go to the library, all kinds of fun stuff. it's pretty great.
& yes, we had a major break through! she is sleeping all night in her crib! we finally found a system that worked (that didn't require major amounts of crying!) so she's been going strong now for 2 weeks! (hopefully i'm not jinxing it by talking about it)
other than that nothing else really... jeff's training & playing soccer a lot, i'm addicted to pintrest.... i've been cooking like a mad woman (so many yummy recipes) & being totally crafty (ha! in my mind.... haven't really gotten to as many as i'd like, but i've "pinned" a ton & feel really productive after seeing all the crafty things i'll get to do.... if i ever get off pintrest). um, what else... we're planning a trip to australia soon. & basically just being blown away at how fast things are going! i mean we have less than a year on guam!! & i'm really really liking guam again. loved it when we got here. hated it when i was pregnant & lena was first here & now all i think about are the things i'll miss when we're gone. the palm trees, the weather, the coconuts, the beach, the friends, jeff's co-workers.... i mean guam is lena's birthplace & it really is this special out of the way, way across the world, escape from the usual kinda place. i wonder if lena will ever get a chance to come back & visit when she's older? who knows. but looking forward to the next assignment.... will it be europe? will it be west coast? please don't let it be alaska. don't even say it.
ok. rant is over. here are a couple videos of the sweet girl....
listen to her high pitched silly laugh & then i apologize for the tilted view, jeff corrects the camera half way through, oh & yes lena steps on spilt cheerios on the floor. that's how she has her snack. yes i let my kid eat of the floor.... doesn't everyone? please don't tell anyone. really.
butterfly birthday bash
lena had her 1st birthday (& 1st birthday party) this weekend! it was the best weekend & it's still not over..... there are plans to open some more presents later today & enjoy some more cake (& of course she's wearing her butterfly romper).... anyways.... friday was her birthday & we kept it low key with dinner & opening family presents. & then saturday was her party!! it was butterfly themed but we didn't get all crazy. no bouncy castles, pony rides, helicopter tours.... we have a few years for that right? hahaha.... but i think it was an awesome party, the kids had fun, the grown-ups had fun & we all celebrated little lena!! (still can't believe she's ONE!)
so we decorated with butterflies, we had a butterfly coloring station, bubbles & bubble machine, pizza, pasta salad, chips salsa & 2 kinds of guac (lena's favorite food is avocado, so ya know), gummy worms, teddy grahams, cheese & crackers, veggie tray, pink lemonade, juice boxes & beer & wine for the big kids. & the cake! my friend maryann makes AMAZING cakes & she made cupcakes & a smash cake for lena! it was beautiful!
lots of our friends came out.... lots of lena's friends came & the only people missing were family back in the states.... BUT they were there in spirit & on the slideshow we made that ran on our computer the whole party. it was full of photos from lena's 1st year. we had pics of lena with grammy, grandma & grandpa, grandpa & granny ann, aunt ash & cousins, great aunts, great cousins, friends from the states & pics of her aunt jenn & cousins mayer & grayson (who sadly have never met each other due to germany & guam being so not close to each other, but will someday soon!)
my favorite part of the party (one of several, but this has such sentimental meaning) was the time capsule.... we had a space where guests could write a little note to lena to open on her 18th birthday. we have some notes coming in via email & snail mail too from those not in attendance. but i think it'll be such a neat thing for her to see & open & have a look back in time. i peeked & read some & couldn't help by get teary. i can only imagine what an amazing young woman lena will grow into. so much love!
and the cake! well, it didn't go as smoothly as it probably will after we have a few more of these under our belts (we'll be pros by the time she's 8).... but really... maryann had her smash cake on a nice plate that A. i didn't want her to knock off & break on the floor & B. just wouldn't even fit on her high chair tray. so jeff & i decided to grab spatulas & carefully move it to her tray. well, as we were doing this i realized we hadn't sung to her & there was no lit candle, so i quickly started us all in singing of "happy birthday" & then prayed that my little one didn't reach for the lit candle that i then put on the cake on her tray well within her reach (good mom i know). needless to say i said "make a wish" very quickly & jeff & i blew out the candle. whew. rough start (but no fires or broken dishes). so then the girl had cake. she didn't get all crazy with it, but she had some bites & then just wanted down. i think it was a lot for her, everyone staring at her, the other kids surrounding her cake like starving little vultures (it was cute, but yeah you'd think these kids were cake addicts needing their fix). so we'll try round 2 later tonight & see if she makes the mess we're all craving to see!
so that's about that. we are tired today, happy it was a great party, but feeling bittersweet..... love seeing our little girl grow, but sad to see our baby fade away..... but we always have the memories (& the pictures!)
the dinning room
outside butterfly color station & bubble place
the spread & max under the table
color station
bubbles & my baby
yay!!
lena's face says it all....
"the candle!!! & everybody sing!!!"
the vultures circling the cake (notice the cute headband antennas i made for the kids?)
the fam
part of the table scape.... i used flower pots to hold the silverware
the beautiful cupcakes
her time capsule (with a fluffy butterfly pen of course) & the notecards are made from card stock from our wedding (that i also used to make her mobile - click here to see it)
some of the beautiful butterfly artwork (i used teeny terra cotta pots to hold the crayons & markers too)
florida, flights, guam.... all is good
ok ok, i've put this off for too long..... i honestly just haven't felt like blogging. but everything has been great. jeff made it back from his deployment, we spent 2 awesome weeks with his parents in florida.... hanging out, visiting the ballet & old friends, going to the park, the beach, shopping & getting in as much target & chick-fil-a before going back to the land of have-nots.
the flights back to guam went much better than i anticipated. lena was a doll..... people kept making comments about how quiet she was, how good she was, how sweet she was & each time someone came & gave us a nice compliment i felt like we were being jinxed & the next flight for sure was gonna be a major melt down. but nope, didn't happen until we got into my friends truck from the airport back to our house in guam. baby girl successfully completed another ridiculous 24+ hours of world traveling. she is the champ. (of course now i've jinxed myself for our trip when we move back, yikes! oh & she'll be almost 2 then as well, boy are we due for it!)
so now that we've been back in guam, we've unpacked (i hesitate to post a pic of the boxes i shipped back.....), been to the beach, jeff's been playing soccer & volleyball (lena & i've been his cheerleaders at a couple of games), we celebrated our 1st thanksgiving as a family..... it's been great. i do miss target of course, oh & my family, heehee.... but guam is more beautiful than i remember & i'm enjoying it more than i thought i would. i guess i feel that it'll go by really fast. i mean lena is almost a year old, can you believe it, a year old?!?!?! so i am appreciating us being here. it really is a special place. even without target. now i leave you with some pictures of our time in florida.........
at the pumpkin patch

the park
harborwalk
lena at halloween as a flower fairy

trick-or-treat

toes in the sand
with grandma & grandpa

on the plane (of course she has her own travel pillow, she is a world traveler after all)
and yes, the boxes..... sad but true....
in my defense, i came over with 2 suitcases & jeff came over to the states with his stuff. well, he left those things with me when he went to iraq, so lena & i had to cram everything from 2 suitcases into 1. that & retail therapy. what can i say?
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