it's so funny the way things develop. about a year ago i was ballet-ing at least 6 days a week & not able to really cross-train (most days too exhausted to even cook dinner). & was in pain more often than i'd like..... i was in great ballet-fighting shape, but i really craved balance for my body (& for my spirit). doing the same very precise, somewhat unnatural movements everyday really wears on the body. tight hip flexors, tight IT band, sore everywhere, continuous knee clicking & jamming....... everyday.
not even a block from the dance studio is a yoga studio & i would look out the window while we were at barre wishing i could skip class & go take yoga (& i'll admit just as many days i also wanted to escape to go enjoy sweet potato fries & a cold glass of chardonnay at the fabulous big city restaurant right across the street) but anyway, i really craved balance. and now the table has flipped..... i now take yoga class about 2 times a week, (with a body conditioning, abs & buns & zumba class thrown in as well) & find myself at the barre a mere once a week. (plus i eat all the sweet potato fries i want...... & chocolate mousse napoleons, carbonaras, pringles, chicken pot pies...... a random assortment of edibles, but it is what i've been eating the past few days) my body feels great, i'm still a bit heavier (could it be those napoleons?) than i was when i was dancing, but i feel more in balance, a less abusive owner of my body.
when i'm in ballet class (saturdays for 2.5 hours- long class & a bit of rehearsing phrases at the end of class) i still feel good, like a dancer, but i am not as "on" as i used to be. the developés are a bit low, no more triple pirouettes & my balances are ok on the left, non existent on the right..... but i feel ok with that. i don't have any reason to push my body, i don't have anywhere i have to "be" dance wise, it's more just about me, in class, doing what i can & i kinda like that. i do miss the theater (my company back in florida is performing coppelia this week), the rehearsals, the accomplishments, the pain & sacrifice..... but i've been through that. i did promise the studio here that i would perform a solo for a demo they're doing at the mall in april. so i have that goal & the rehearsals (more like run through it once & it's ok, so i'm done), to work on. but the performance is gonna be on concrete (will need 2 weeks of yoga to counter the pain from dancing on that) & i'm just doing some waltz turns, chaines & boureés & i don't think anyone expects a lot more than that.
it's a weird thing here, i keep waiting for something to develop...... i know about the demo at the mall & the guam ballet is doing a production of sirena (guam story of a mermaid) in august which they've talked about me being a part of. they say i might be able to teach a class, but nothing is set yet. i guess coming from a place where my roles as teacher & performer were so developed & i had a contract (that makes it all so much more clear) & a pay check (also makes things so much better) & then to here where it took forever just to find a class to take. i suppose it's normal to be trying to get my foot in the door & figuring out where i fit in. i need more patience. i hear my mom singing her patience song in my head ("p, a, t.... i, e, n..... c, e spells patience") which i can laugh about now, but when you're 5 & throwing a tantrum, or maybe even having a 16 year old tantrum, it's not nearly as funny. love ya mom!
& now after spending way too long on this post, i leave you with a photo of those infamous naploeons (which i made myself & felt such pride when a friend told me she thought they were from a restaurant) & some downward dog..... to maintain balance.
(photo from able bodied yoga)
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